Hey, Man!
by Moonbyrd
Summary: Songfic. Angsty start for no reason, but it gets absolutely pointless. It's fun with no point! ^_^


Hmm....okay, the song is by Nelly Furtado. (Nelly Furtado; Whoa, Nelly!) Now that I think about it, though, the song and the fic are two completely different styles. Oh, well. I guess insanity is in my blood tonight... The song doesn't really go with the plot, but it was what inspired me, so deal. ;p Okay, um...warnings....well, definitely OOC, no real pairings, but a few references....   
This is mostly to make people who feel sorry for the poor g-boys and their love problems feel better. ;) Friends, hanging out, y'know, usual off-time pursuits.  
  
//lyrics//  
#Notes  
  
  
  
Duo looked up as Heero entered the room. The Japanese boy's eyes were wide and he looked around the room without really seeing anything. Duo stood as his eyes met that dark, frightened blue. Heero took a step forward and fainted.  
  
//Hey, man, don't look so scared. You know I'm only testing you out.//  
  
Duo ran to Heero's side. "Heero? Heero! Wake up, man!! Heero!!!" He nearly panicked as he pulled his partner onto the bed and checked his pulse. "Quatre! Get in here!"  
  
The Arabian boy came at a run. "Duo? What is-Allah!"  
  
Medical supplies began flying around the room with unmatched speed as the two boys tried to figure out what was wrong with their fallen comrade. Duo whistled as he peeled off Heero's tank top. "Check it out, Q. Three bullets. No wonder he was so messed up. Blood loss must be through the roof!"  
  
Quatre shuddered. "Better him than me, but best no one."  
  
Duo laughed shortly and reached for the vidphone. He quick-dialed Iria and explained the situation to Quatre's sister while the blonde began cleaning the wounds.  
  
"I'll be there as quickly as I can," Iria promised, watching her brother's ministrations.  
  
  
//Hey, man, don't look so angry, you're real close to figuring me out."  
  
Three days later, Heero woke up. He started to sit, but fell back against the pillow as his chest burst into pain. "Itai..."  
  
Iria laughed. "Joining the world of the living again? Here. These will help. Duo!"  
  
"Is he acting suicidal?"  
  
Heero scowled as he swallowed the pain killers. "Homicidal, maybe."  
  
Duo bounced into the room. "Hey, man! Nice to see you up. Care to tell me why you volunteered for target practice for the Ozzies?"  
  
The scowl deepened. "Not my choice."  
  
"Sure, sure. Next time, use protection." Iria cackled as she left. Duo rolled his eyes and plopped himself on the bed.  
  
"How long?" Duo cocked his head at the question. "Two days for the mission, three from blood loss. Quatre's here, Wufei just got back, and Trowa's hanging at the circus."  
  
"Hn," Heero closed his eyes. "Why am I so tired?"  
  
Duo snorted. "You lost blood, Vampire-man. Humans need time to replenish their beauty."  
  
Heero smacked the American's arm. "I'll Vampire you next time we're in our Gundams. Where are the others?"  
  
"Quatre's catching up on WEI paperwork, and Wufei's over at Treize's."  
  
"That's still going on?" Heero raised an eyebrow.  
`  
Duo grinned evilly and stood. "And he still thinks nobody knows. Oh, well. It must be all that Chinese food. Addles the brain."  
  
  
//We are a part of a circle. It's like a mobius strip, and it goes round and round until it loses a link.//  
  
Heero made a face as he stood. Two weeks and he was still stiff. Iria applauded his accomplishment and passed him a bottle of juice. "See?" She grinned. "Almost as good as new! Work out those muscles a bit and you can go blow up another fort or two thousand."  
  
Quatre gaped at his sister. "You're encouraging it?"  
  
"Believe it or not, brother dear, not everyone in this family has dog dung for brains. Common sense and a twisted sense of humor are all that got me through medical school," Iria noogied him as she passed, skirting Duo to dodge his retaliation.  
  
"Whoa! Hey, people. Just because Arabs have good balance doesn't mean Americans do!" Duo yelped as he nearly dropped the tray of vegetables he was carrying.  
  
Heero made another face. "And just because some Americans like broccoli doesn't mean Japanese people do."  
  
Duo stuck his tongue out and threw a piece of the offending greenery at his partner. "Too bad. Your loss, my gain. Mmmm...fresh broccoli with Ranch dressing...heaven in a salad."  
  
Wufei snorted from his position on the porch railing. "Give me some cheese balls, I'm happy for life."  
  
Iria mock-punched him. "Why is it that so many Oriental people are obsessed with junk food? You'd think the Western population would cover that portion of taste buds. Instead, we have two junk food junkies from the Far East, a health nut from America, and two Arabians raised on top-quality who just don't care, as long as it's edible!"#  
  
Quatre tackled her. "We're just so lucky, 'sister dear.' And, I believe, laughter fights cancer?" He attacked her sides with nimble fingers, and she melted into gales of laughter on the spot.  
  
Heero raised an eyebrow.  
  
"You're ticklish?!" Duo gaped. Iria choked and tried to push Quatre away ("You should-hack-respect-giggle, cackle-your elders-laugh, wheeze-and doctors!")  
  
//And there's a shadow in the sky, and it looks like rain, and shit is gonna fly once again.//  
  
"She is, especially along both shoulders," Trowa's voice answered from the garden.  
  
"Trowa!" Wufei looked up from his carrots. "How's Catharine?"  
  
The acrobat pulled himself up to perch next to Wufei. "Fine. PMS-ey, but fine."  
  
Iria sat up, gasping for air. "Oh no! Now they're all here! I'd better head for the hills!"  
  
Heero raised the other eyebrow and reached for a piece of cucumber.  
  
"Hee hee," Quatre wiggled his fingers at Iria and snagged a cherry tomato. "Just so you know, I invited a few people to come eat our snacks and put us out of our beds. Hilde, Relena, Sally, Treize, Zechs, Noin, and maybe Lady Une will be coming to visit sometime."  
  
Wufei fell off the porch.  
  
Trowa coughed. "Did you invite the whole Oz army?" He leaned over to help Wufei.  
  
"Hey, just 'cuz Zechs beat you at checkers the other night doesn't mean he's a bad person," Duo munched happily.  
  
Trowa snorted and looked at Iria. "How long did you take off?"  
  
She shrugged. "Undetermined. I mentioned illness in the family, some minor tragedies, life threats. They told me to come back when I felt like it."  
  
"Spoiled rotten peanut," Quatre muttered, and grinned when she made a face at him.  
  
  
//Hey, man, we look at each other with ample eyes, so why not some time to discover what's behind your eyes?//  
  
Zechs slammed down his full house triumphantly and grinned as Trowa groaned and tossed down a pair of threes. "Awwww...gambling just isn't your thing, is it?"  
  
Trowa scowled and threw a cheese ball at him. ("Hey!" Wufei looked indignant and scuttled off to find 'safer' seating for his snack.)  
  
"Glad I bowed out," Hilde sang as she flipped her hair back. Relena looked at her in disgust for a moment before muttering, "Stupid musicians and their obsession with making everything musical."  
  
Une ran a hand through her hair. "I knew that guitar was a bad idea, but would he listen to me? Nooooooo."  
  
Duo frowned. "She said she wanted one. Who am I to offend the birthday gods?"  
  
"An amoeba," Sally piped up as she stole his drink.  
  
The American boy made a face and tossed a celery stick at her. "Lay off the Kool-Aid, lady. Mine."  
  
"Not yours anymore, Rapunzel. Property of the Sank Kingdom. Mine!" She grinned and downed the glass.  
  
"You're not from the Sank Kingdom!" Noin crowed from the other side of the room.  
  
Sally shrugged. "Whoops. Miscalculation. Oh, well. You'll have to pump my stomach to get it back now. Thirsty?"  
  
Heero shuddered and rubbed his chest, then passed Duo his rootbeer float. Sally grinned and trotted over to the Twister board to challenge Quatre and Noin. Wufei crept to Treize's side and plopped himself in a chair, cheese balls tucked securely up his shirt, where Trowa couldn't abuse them.  
  
//I've got so many questions that I want to ask you. I am so tired of mirrors-pour me a glass of your wine.//  
  
"ARGH!" The human tower that was Hilde, Sally, and Quatre toppled over, landing on Noin. Absolute chaos on the Twister board was not helped by Iria shooting little styrofoam darts at them. Trowa sighed and went to relieve Quatre's sister of her weapon while Relena and Une covered their eyes and went to pop in a movie.#  
  
Zechs rolled his eyes as Noin staggered over to the table and "died," falling dramatically over the card table and utterly destroying the neat stacks of poker chips. "Must you kill my profits?"  
  
Quatre snorted from the other side of the room, where he was still trying to extricate himself from Sally and Hilde, who was singing at the top of her lungs.  
  
"Why do we put up with this?" Treize wondered, reaching past Wufei's neckline to sang a handful of cheese balls. "Can't we just gag her or something?"  
  
Hilde stuck her tongue out and pulled free of the others. "Fine. I'd like to see you try to carry a tune."  
  
Wufei shuddered, "No. You never will. You don't want to."  
  
Raised eyebrows and sweatdrops broke out all through the group. Wufei, oblivious, munched happily on his junk food and hummed to himself until Treize poked him.  
  
"Movie time!" Duo declared, jumping up. "Hey, ojousan, what's in the machine?"  
  
Relena tossed a pillow at him from her position on the couch. "Star Wars."  
  
"Again?!" Heero and Noin groaned. ("Wait a second, Noin! You can't talk! You're DEAD!" Zechs scowled.)  
  
The Queen of the World made a face and turned back to her video, entranced immediately. Heero shrugged and grabbed a bag of candy before plunking himself in an easy chair to watch the movie for the...oh....three hundred seventy-fourth time. Une glared at him from the floor where she was stretched out on an inflatable mattress. The rest of the group exchanged looks, shrugged, and joined them.  
  
//And there's a shadow in the sky, and it looks like rain, and shit is gonna fly once again.//  
  
Water hissed down the roof as the leader of the Oz army yawned. Treize blinked sleepily and surveyed the room, counting those still awake. Everyone but Trowa, Une, Hilde, and Duo was yawning. Trowa and Une were asleep, but Duo and Hilde were still wide awake and chattering happily.  
  
Treize made a face and stretched out on the card table. Any night at the Gundam house was too long....  
  
  
//I've got a bunch of government cheques at my door. Each morning I send them back, but they always send me more.//  
  
"You are a moron, Duo Maxwell!"  
  
"Am not!"  
  
"Are too!"  
  
"Am not!  
  
"Are too!"  
  
"Am n-"  
  
"FOR THE LOVE OF CHEESEBALLS, SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
"..."  
  
"But Wu! It's only three in the morning! How could you have been asleep?"  
  
//I look at myself in the mirror; am I vital today? Hey man, I let my conscience get in the way!//  
  
Zechs snorted in his sleep and rolled over...landing on Une, who was half under the sofa. The resulting (sleepy) scuffle succeeded in waking the other party-goers, all of whom groaned at the bright sunlight and cheerful birdsong.  
  
"Please tell me the clock does not say eleven." Noin moaned and buried her head under Trowa's arm.  
  
Duo bounced up from his position on the table (he had kicked off all of the food items at some point during the night) and danced around the room. "Morning, sleepyheads! Up and at 'em!"  
  
Treize looked up from Zech's hair, which he was attempting to finger-comb. "Duo, how can you be so energized? You couldn't have gotten more than three hours of sleep!"  
  
"Utter resilience, my good man," Duo flashed a grin and hopped out onto the porch to lay claim to a tray of carrots left over form the night before.  
  
Heero glowered as he levered himself up from a chair. "Coffee, anyone?"  
  
Relena, Noin, Zechs, and Iria nodded their thanks and collapsed back to their seats. (This was not a conscious decision on Zech's part: Treize had just pulled the hair in his hand down, and viola! Zechs came tumbling after.)  
  
"THE HHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLLLLLSS ARE ALIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE!! WITH THE SOUND OF MUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-"  
  
"DUO! Shut up! Please!" Quatre winced away as Dorothy screamed in his ear. His sleepy mind failed to inform him that he was off balance, and three seconds later he found himself blinking up at Trowa. "Mm...happy to see me?"  
  
The boisterous American pilot launched himself through the door at the couple. "DOG-PILE!!!"  
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" *WHUMP!!!!!*  
  
//And there's a shadow in the sky, and it looks like rain, and shit is gonna fly once again//  
  
"Are there any more Doritos?" Sally pulled her head out of the potato chip bag long enough to shake her head at Noin. #  
  
"Gr," the purple haired woman muttered, and settled to munching on Oreos she pulled from Wufei's hair.  
  
//and I don't mean to rain on your parade, but pathos got me once again...//  
  
A crack of thunder shook the house. "Booger," Iria glanced up at the sky. "Let's pack it up, y'all. When this blow comes, it's going to be a good one. And it's coming in fast and hard!"  
  
A second sonic boom answered her as the G-crew scrambled to pick up the croquet wickets. "Does this mean I win?" Relena wanted know.  
  
Her brother favored her with an exasperated glare. "'Lena, how many time do I have to tell you? It's the first one to get there who wins, not the last!"  
  
The game uprooted, the entire G-crew returned to the house, sullen. "Well...since it's already so late, why not extend this party to tomorrow?" Hilde glomped onto Quatre's arm and widened her eyes. The little Arabian was not proof against puppy eyes of any kind, and immediately agreed.  
  
//and I don't want ambivalence no more, I don't want ambivalence no more, I don't want ambivalence no more, no, I don't want ambivalence no more!//  
  
Duo crowed his delight and rushed to order a pizza as everyone else exchanged worried glances. It was going to be another long night.  
  
  
#Would you believe my lunch group is almost identical to this?  
#Maybe I should have just called this "A Day in the Life of Moonie." This is typical party madness with the lunch crew....  
#I'm serious-this really happened! I woke up at seven in the morning after a party and looked up at the girl in the chair above me (I was on the floor). Her head was IN the bag, and she was munching happily away....  



End file.
